What the fuck was I thinking? I wasn’t that is what is wrong. This guy, seemed so perfect at first. All those cute things guys do to make you like them. And now what… It’s all freakin’ crap. Every single day is the same damn thing. I have to fucking feel low as fuck because his bitch ass makes me feel crappy all the damn time. Like really what am I doing? I got out of a relationship seeking happiness and now I’m back to square one. Who am I trying to fool? Really, this is getting tiring. I can’t have guy friends without him bitching. I can’t be with my friends. Like really what the FUCKKKKKKK I’m so damn done with everything. Like I can’t.
I really fucking hate having a common social network with your bitch ass. You know it bugs knowing that you follow little hoes that flirt with you. I know you know these girls want you. You are THIRSTY for attention and honestly it sucks being in a damn relationship with you. I know you want other girls, why can’t you fucking tell me. I know what I’m supposed to fucking do but how the fuck can I when I am so madly fucking in love with your stupid ass self. I know I’m not the girl for you cause if I was you would have changed. You would act like you give a fuck for me but we both fucking know you don’t. I know it’s time. I just don’t want to be the one to do it cause I’m to fucking weak to do it. I just wish I could I could make you realize what you have. But not even that will work because I’m not enough for you. And I hate that I can’t be because I wish I was your world just how you are mine.
If I only knew how to fucking share my emotions with you you would know that I am so terribly hurt by everything. And now things are going back to fucking crap. For once in your life can I be number one and not number 100. I understand I’m asking to much of you considering that you actually have a life and have friends that live so close to you but is it so hard for you to be a boyfriend and fucking care for me for 3 seconds. Sorry I fucking want a real relationship not this shit that we are in.
I always thought “how can girls be so psycho with their boyfriends. No wonder the guys will dump their asses in a heartbeat.” But look at what I have become. I have become the girl I never wanted to be. I am my own worst nightmare. I have a good relationship… There may have been some wrong doings that have made me worse… But because I choose to make me worse. I relive the past constantly and never look forward. I obbsess at the thought that he may or may not be cheating. I over analyze things he has said or done… Why? To make me feel like I have no reason to be with him or…? Why do I constantly think about him cheating? Why is it that the one good thing I have in my life, the one guy that actually brings me happiness, peace is the one I am trying to push away. I know that we are both at fault but why do I only point fingers at his mistakes. Like my mom says “every time you point your finger at someone there are three more pointing back at you” and it’s the truth. I need I let go of the past because its bringing negativity to my mind and now ruining my relationship. If there really is something that he is hiding from me God will protect me. I know he will. For the meantime I just need to try to trust the person that has been there for me through so much.
the only reason i wear all black is so i can absorb the energy from the sun and become the most powerful being on the earth
sad blog for sad teens
if i could bring one dead person back to life i’d bring back Walt Disney just to show him the shows on disney channel and see his reaction